Sunday, August 31, 2008

Tween Angst

I never had a sister, so I don't have any experience in dealing with the rivalry between sisters...but man, my girls have it bad.

As you know, Mikayla has had a lot of opportunities to be independent. As the oldest, she has a fair amount of responsibility, and so, correspondingly, we have tried to give her a lot of privileges.

This has been difficult for Emma, who likes to think that she is big, and should be able to do everything that Mikayla does.

Sometimes, she gets to, and sometimes she doesn't.

Well, Mikayla turns 12 soon... and it is a special age for her. She just got contacts and soon, in October, she will be allowed to get her ears pierced.

This is KILLING Emma. She has wanted her ears pieced for so long, she just can't hardly stand it!

She regularly talks about it, she thinks about it often, and pesters her Dad about it ALL the time.

He has continued to say no, adamant in the belief that she should wait until she is 12 for this privilege (and responsibility).

Well, with Mikayla about to reach this magic number, it has pushed things to a head with Emma, because she sat down and wrote her Dad the following letter.




I particularly like the drawing where she tells Troy he is the best dad ever, and he can be seen telling her that she can get her ears pierced.

Now, I don't really think it's all that big a deal to get your ears pierced...and it would be okay with me if she did it.

However, Troy has really strong feelings about this, and so I support his stance.

But, I feel for Emma too.

So...I am conducting a little poll. And for those of you who prefer to read us through the google reader, come by, and take the poll at the side of the blog.

Let's hear what you think.

Maybe you can help Emma get her ears pierced...or convince her as to why it would be better to wait.

21 comments:

Andrea said...

I don't know here, Troy. Emma has made a pretty good case for herself. She is right with #2--Mikayla had her chance and decided against it. Shouldn't Emma have hers, too??

I can't wait for Anna to get her ears pierced!! As soon as she can say, "I want my ears pierced" we'll be running out the door!

I'm Team Emma on this one! Good luck, Emma!

lilluv89 said...

Hi Katie Mathis here. That is the sweetest and most adorable letter in the world. I think nine is a good age especially if Mikayla had hers done when she was eight. Good luck!

Bringhurst Family said...

I had to wait till I was twelve and it sucked. We let Sydni on her 7th birthday. I would have done 8 but we didn't want to overshadow the relevance of 8 and baptism. I just wanted her to be old enough and responsible enough to take care of them herself. Also, she is not allowed free reign on earing choices till she's older. You should see the things she would choose to wear.

Sarah said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! LOVE the drawing. PLEASE tell me you're saving that for future generations.

I have to say that I got my ears pierced when I was six- then they got infected because I was too young to take care of them. But I got them re-pierced when I was eight and did just fine. So, I say she's probably ready. However, it seems unfair that you made Mikayla wait until she's 12 and then let Emma do it when she's nine, simply because she begged and pleaded. So I'd probably make her wait just to be fair! Sorry, Emma!!

Charlene said...

I was eight years old when I got my ears pierced, I did fine. I told my Emma when she turns eight she can have her ears pierced. I figured if she is responsible to get baptized she is responsible to get her ears pierced. Sorry Troy. I am curious for Troys reasons as to why he feels your girls need to wait?

Nathan, Mariann &Talon said...

lol!
That is so funny.
I got my ears pierced when I was in I think the 3rd grade. I think I was to young. They got infected and I had to take them out. I really didn't have an urge to get them pierced again. I finally got them pierced like two years ago.
I think Emma would do good. She seems alot more mature than I was at her age. :) Good luck Emma!

Hilary said...

Well, I think you need to have a rule and stick with it.
I got mine pierced at 12, and I LOVED earings til' college. When nursing school said we could only wear studs, and the only ones I had made my ears itch, so I didn't wear any and now my holes have grown-in.
Anyway... I think 12 is a great age. Until then they can concetrate on being little.

Melanie said...

I was five. It was a bribe to stop sucking my thumb! haha So funny now! I got the second set of holes at age 12 and the third at 18!! Then Pres. Hinckley said only one! haha I think the rules can be adjusted. Part of being the oldest is finding out that Mom & Dad may change the rules for everyone else and circumstances change. I'd let her get them pierced, but if they get infected then she has to take them out and not try again until she's older. But hey, if you were my sister you'd have them pierced as a baby and you wouldn't be having this conversation! haha

Kimber said...

Our family is all about consistency, but I've also learned that circumstances can change - forcing you to rethink rules and exercise some flexibility. Maybe a compromise....let Mikayla get them pierced now and give her time enjoy her privilege as the oldest child. Then, bump Emma's "piercing" age to 10. That way you are taking into consideration her desire and maturity level but are not giving into the moment.

Anonymous said...

You're on your own on this one. LOL!

susan said...

I got my ears pierced when I was 8, but I wasn't good about keeping them clean and so they got infected and closed up. That happened another two times over the next couple of years. Finally, on the fourth time (I think I was 12), I was responsible enough to take care of them. So I would lean toward waiting until 12, but I guess it depends on how responsible you think Emma will be with them.

Tia said...

Well, ashli and I got our ears pierced at the same time. I don't really remember is there was a rule of waiting til 12 but I personally think ashli was too scared to do it by herself so she waited for me. lol (don't tell) But I think ear piercing has more cons than pros. You have to worry about keeping them clean, then if they match your outfit; it's just a really big pain. My dad told me that if Heavenly Father wanted holes in our ears, he would have put them there.

Lara said...

That letter is a classic! What a smart girl she is!

I had to wait until I was twelve, but we let Cami get her ears pierced when she was nine and have no regrets.

With that kind of case Emma's made for herself I'd say give her a chance (and that she's destined to follow in her parent's footsteps in careers). :)

Tamee said...

Love the letter. Tell Emma I feel the pain, being that I was the fourth daughter in my family. I felt like ALL my sisters were having ALL the fun and somehow ALL the fun was going to run out. BUT, Troy hold strong, my man. We couldn't get ours pierced until we were 8 and on the Honor Roll all year.

Lia said...

I was the oldest of 6, I had 3 sisters younger than me, and one just 1 year younger. My parents had set age limits for certain things like wearing make up and shaving. (My dad wouldn't allow getting our ears pierced until 18) Anyway, I had to wait until those ages, but then they would allow my sister a year younger than me to start when I did. And, I hated that. It wasn't fair to me that I had to wait and she didn't. I resented her for that. So I'm sorry Emma, I'm team Troy.

But be careful Troy, better let her get them pierced when you say, or she might rebel later and get them pierced twice like me.

Floyd Family said...

I couldn't get my ears pierced till I was 18. I wanted them so badly while I was in elementry and jr. high. My grandma wanted to take me to get them pierced, but I knew my parents would kill us both, so we went and got some really fun clip on earings instead. It wasn't quite as good, but it might be worth a try. As a mother of boys, I'm just grateful I don't have to make this call. I do think that sometimes having to wait for something makes you appreciate it more and is a good learning experience. (Nonetheless, 18 is a little too long to wait!)

Shelby said...

I had to wait until I was 12, too. Then my dad also mentioned that if I ever got my ears double-pierced, he was changing my name to Rosarita (apologies for the ethnic slight) and would not pay for my college.

On my 18th birthday, while at BYU, I realized that I had paid for my own college tuition and celebrated by promptly getting them double pierced. Until of course the prophet had some opinions about that.

12 is good.

Paulette said...

I think if being eight is old enough to be responsible for baptism, I think you should let her be responsible for this decision. Come one Dad! Give in a little.
Love you, your big Sis.

Jolinda said...

Obviously a hot topic...

I had to wait until I was 14, and like most of the other posts, had a second piercing by 16. Now, I rarely wear earings, but never in my second hole. I did the second one without permission, and now wish I would've listened to my parents. (They knew the prophet would someday back them up, I suppose!) Because of having to wait, I always said when my girls wanted their ears pierced, I would let them. I didn't make them be a certain age. Angeline has had hers pierced for years, while Roxie (the oldest) has chosen not to for now. I think older is a little better, but it wasn't that big of deal to me as a parent.

My Troy always says the same as someone else mentioned...that if Heavenly Father wanted holes in our ears, he would've put them there. He calls Roxie's "virgin ears" and says that's far sexier than piercings. So I'm not sure what attracts him to me - HAHA! :o) JK

I say you will make the best decision for your circumstance. I do agree however that Emma should have to wait until a different time and let Mikayla enjoy the experience on her own for a while.

Anonymous said...

maybe you should remind troy of the time he got his ears pierced, when his mother didn't want him to. yes i know he was older, it;s just that he did it in spite of his mom :( i'm sure emma would be responsible. anonymous p.s. how about emma getting the stick on one's?

M said...

I love the letter. Wow. How could anyone resist? Troy has some serious backbone.

I wasn't allowed to get my ears pierced until I was 12. After the big birthday finally arrived, I found out I was allergic to pretty much every metal out there and had to take out the studs they had pierced me with because I had developed these huge welts on my ears. Oddly, the holes never closed over and now, years later, I can wear silver and gold, but nothing else. Still, I think if I had known what a drama it was going to be, I would never had bothered pierce my ears in the first place. It's a huge disappointment to wait until you're 12 for something and then discover you can't do it anyway! :)

Related Posts with Thumbnails