1.3.13

I am not a big fan of being in photos...but I spent a lot of years not being in them...and I realized that my children don't care what I look like or what I weigh...they love me and they will one day be sad that I wasn't in any photos.

So I have tried to take a few more photos of myself...in that vein...

Day One

I really like breaks -- time off -- periods where we can reflect and ponder and resolve to change.

I know, for me, sometimes the resolutions don't last very long -- but I still find it helpful to continue to make those resolutions.

The last couple of years I have chosen one word to focus on during the course of the year.

Last year's word was Patience...and I did okay, but I definitely have a long way to go.

This year...I have chosen the word CHOOSE.

I want to really think about each day and the things I want to accomplish. I want to have a sense of purpose and meaning to the things i'm doing and I want to make the best choices possible.

I feel like I let too many moments pass without enjoying them. I want to make better choices for myself and for my family.

I know not every moment is going to be special or full, but so many of them can be more than they currently are.

I want to use this word in application to my relationships -- to the things that I say and do. I want to get to the point where I pause before I say things and make sure that i'm not short or impatient...and make sure that I am choosing and doing the things that I should.

It's a big change for me.

I am such a shoot by the hip person...saying exactly what's on my mind. But that isn't always the best thing and I am committed to becoming a better person.

6 weeks out

I got the all clear today from my doctor. I've healed up nicely and all restrictions have been lifted.

Thank goodness, because not being able to pick up more than 5 pounds has been difficult.

To celebrate Troy and I went to Graffiato's. It was A-MAZING.

Try the gnocchi!

It is owned by Mike Isabella (of Top Chef fame) and he was there today...being taped and photographed and stuff. I know it's dorky...but I thought it was cool.

D Day

I know i've been kind of quiet here...and all for good reason.

I have been getting my life (and in particular my house) ready before I undergo major surgery tomorrow.

I have to admit that I am a little nervous. I have never had surgery before and it's a little scary to think about what could go wrong.

But I am quite confident that everything is going to go right and all will be well.

And...honestly in the whole scheme of things what I have to experience is minor in comparison to what others are currently facing -- and keeping things in perspective is pretty important to me right now.

In case you have any interest in what type of surgery I am having...I will provide details below.

If you are not interested...PLEASE...stop reading now. Especially if you're squeamish (or, you know...a man).

...

...

...

If you're still with me, as you know, we have had quite a few children in a relatively short amount of time.

7 babies in 10 years.

I know. Crazy.

So, I have had quite a bit of damage done to my pelvic floor and I will be having reconstructive surgery done.

It's a total of 7 different procedures done over 6 hours.

I have heard that the recovery is pretty rough, but again, I hesitate to complain as I know it will be but a moment and I will once again feel whole and healthy -- and I am really looking forward to that!

For a more detailed description, I found this online:

What is Pelvic Floor Reconstruction?
Pelvic floor reconstructive surgery consists of several procedures for correcting a condition called “pelvic organ prolapse.”

When the muscles of the pelvic floor are damaged or become weak – often due to childbirth – they are sometimes unable to support the weight of some or all of the pelvic and abdominal organs. If this occurs, one or more of the organs may drop (prolapse) below their normal positions, causing symptoms including discomfort, pain, and pressure.

The goal of pelvic floor reconstruction is to restore the normal structure and function of the affected organs.

About 35 percent of women will develop some form of pelvic organ prolapse. 

It's funny how people never tell you what can happen to your body as you give birth and age.

I really don't know why that is, but i've been very surprised at how many women i've meet who are dealing with or have dealt with these issues. 

Again, I feel like everything is going to be okay, and we will keep you posted on how things go.

Spooky

We had our ward party tonight...Troy and I were in charge.

I thought it went well and everyone seemed to have a good time.

There was a huge turnout. I'm certain of the exact number, but I am guess well over 300 people. We had 20 different chilis and I was happy to see the Englis Family take top spot..although the Dzarans only missed it by one point!

I have spent the week getting everyone's costume's ready and I am pleased with the final result.

Everyone chose a different Disney villian.

Mikayla was Cruella DeVille:

Emma was the Queen of Hearts (and I am especially happy with her costume since I sewed it myself...and was super worried about how all the piecing would work on the dress and jacket...but I thought it turned out nicely):

Joe was Lotsa Hugging Bear (sewed this one as well...and I have to say...he is probably the only 12 year old boy in the world who would want to be a giant pink bear for Halloween, but he pulled it off pretty well, and managed to figure out that he could pretty much get any girl he wanted to hug him while wearing this costume. : ) Such a ladies man...don't know where that comes from. lol!)

Josh did not attend the ward party...but he is smee (from peter pan) and I will post his photo on Halloween).

Becky was the evil queen from Snow White (this is her mean face):

And Katie was the witch from Snow White (the Queen transformed -- she got some crazy mask painted on during the children's carinval...so i'll post another photo on Halloween with her nose and basket full of apples):

Finally...Troy was Captain Hook ... although I was unable to pick up his coat before the party...so he looks a little more...Little Richard than Big Bad Sailor. (Sorry Troy!)

And I was running around like crazy, so no photos of my Maleficent costume (I will take one!) So...just a little self portrait after it was all over. (Do I look a little too excited? :) )

16 years later

It's August 19th.

16 years ago today:

I was 24 years old.
Living in Provo.
In between my 2nd and 3rd year of law school.
Crazy Nervous.

...and right about this time of day...I was just married.

I know everyone always said they married their best friend, but the truth of the matter is...I didn't yet know Troy well enough to call him my best friend.

We dated for just 30 days before becoming engaged.

I know that's crazy short and I'd have a fit if one of my kids decided to do that...but when you know, you know.

And believe me, I KNEW.

After being engaged for a few weeks, Troy left for a study abroad in Russia.

We were apart for almost our entire engagement.

So...on my wedding day I did not marry my best friend.

But...16 years later, i'm so grateful to say that I am married to him now.

The love that we share...it's been tried and tested...and has grown with every trial we have faced together.

And we are both better for it.

So, let me just say Happy Anniversary Troy.

I am ever grateful that we keep working on it...and keep making it better.

So glad that we are on the same page about where we are going and how we want to get there.

i love you!

Fun in the Sun

When we went up to get Emma from sailing camp, we had the chance to play a little as a family.

We went to the yacht club (uh...never imagined myself at a yacht club!),  went swimming, went boating and tubing. It was a blast.

The kids even talked me into giving it a try.

And totally loved it when i had a major wipeout.

Which, by the way, reaffirms for me that I am well and truly old.

And, poor sweet Becky.

She took a ride with the big kids and had a major wipe out. MAJOR. She was so scared and did not want to ride again.

But, Troy and I got on with her and told her that we would take it nice and slow.

She was terrified of it all. But, she was a trooper and held on. I am so proud of her!

We really appreciate Quoc and Ellen taking Emma for the week and showing us a really good time.

Best Birthday EVER!

I am so lucky...to have such good friends and such good family...who love me so very much.

Troy and Andrea threw me a big party and we played Nertz all night.

Seriously...did I mention how lucky I am?

I  cannot believe i'm 40. Wow.

There is no blowing out your birthday candles...when they are actually sparklers.

And Troy.

Sweet Troy.

I know I give him a hard time...but I could not ask for a better spouse. He is the best!

He went all out with the party and even made these awesome party gifts for everyone.

And he got me an iPad. OMGOSH. I'm in heaven.

Thank you so much for all your well wishes. I really do feel so loved!!!

Personal Space

We ate frozen dinners, had piles of laundry, and just spent a week with the house in chaos.

Why?

Because I finally got my office done -- my own office. my own space. yay.

We moved Troy out of the office and made some space for him upstairs.

And...so I spent some time moving everything out of the room. I painted, put up new shelves and got everything put back in. I still have more craft supplies to move into my office, and plan of purging anything that doesn't fit into my office - can't wait for that!

here are the BEFORE photos:

and here are the AFTER photos:

the walls are a pretty, pale gray and i love my little reading nook. i'm so happy to have my own space! 

Fear Itself

Are you afraid of anything?

My list of fears is long and varied.

I have tried hard to overcome many of my fears...but there are many left to conqure.

So now I have a new fear to add -- the stick shift.

Troy got a new car -- which we are all very happy about.

But, unfortunately for me, it's, yes you guessed it, a stick shift.

Getting into that car was beyond nerve wracking.

Driving around town was an exercise in paranoia.

Would I stall out? Oh my word, of course I did.

Would I ruin the engine? Gosh, I hope not.

Would smoke come from under the car as I mangled whatever was under the hood? Um...a little, I think.

So, after running just one of my errands...I drove myself home and decided not the drive the car anymore.

That is until I had to drive to Barnes & Noble night with Josh and Becky.

Oy.

I think heaven was on my side as I drove there and back -- not too many red light, not too many hills, even a good parking space without anyone around.

Of course, all the cars passing me by on the road, and the need to go nice and slow might have made everyone else crazy -- but it got me home.

And as I parked the car -- a few times over -- I vowed never to do that again.

Troy says I need to face my fears. But, I think that this is one fear that can stay on the list.

Maybe tomorrow I can work on spiders.

Smile, Silly

I have been wanting to go to the temple to scout it out and see where the best places to take photos are. So, last night we took advantage of a free Saturday, did some location scouting, got in a goofy little photo shoot, did sealings, and had an awesome dinner at PF Changs. All in all the perfect evening!

We got a late start to the temple, so we pretty much had lost the light when we got there...but I managed a few of photos -- where Rob and Andrea weren't TOTALLY hamming it up!

Here's a couple of my favs.




Did I mention that they were being goofy?

And, here's Rob practicing his "I'm a future General Authority" pose.



And, since we were mostly shooting in the dark, I thought we should make the most of the light...and got this cool one.



And, Andrea was nice enough to get a similar one of me and Troy.



I have to say, my favorite part was playing with the light, and getting these fun shots of the temple. Isn't it amazing how different it can look, depending on the time of day?





Really, as much fun as it was to go and play, it was super great to be at the temple. I really enjoyed the session of sealings we did...and in particular because the sealer was interested in instructing as well as sealing, so I got to learn a lot too.

Nurse Katie

54/365 sick day

Question: What't the best cure for a mom who just doesn't feel well?

Answer: I don't know either, but I promise, it's not my 18 month old.



But, Troy does manage a hail mary at the end of the day.

Ordinary Days

Well, it's catch up time for me again.

Why is it that I can't seem to get anything done with Troy and the kids around? Oh well. We're having fun, right?

17/365 Too big, too small



I have always wanted a dining room table, but it just hasn't been in the cards for us. But the time is finally at hand. We are going to buy our first dining room set. I am SUPER excited. Now, only if we could find one we like! Josh and Becky were troopers and went shopping with us. Too bad sitting in this ginormous chair was the most fun they had all day.

18/365 Too Tired



Poor Troy. He is always exhausted by the end of the week, and he has gotten to the point where he can fall asleep anywhere. Even with the kids running around like crazy, the TV on, and me snapping photos, he never did wake up. I think this is just one more sign that he is getting old.

19/365 What's one more?



So, the kids had sleepovers today. It's so funny. One person asks for one, and pretty soon I am inundated with requests for friends to come over and play and spend the night. At a certain point, does one more kid make any difference? No, not really.

20/365 Self Portrait



I know. You were beginning to wonder if I was going to be in any of these photos. When I was trying to figure out what today's photo might be, I was thinking of all the things I do, and really, one of my most enjoyable pastimes is scrapping. And, often, while I am scrapping, I end up on the phone with Erica. So, this is me scrapping, talking to Erica. I tried to get her to take a photo of herself so I would have a set. But, no such luck.

Party Like It's 1989

I have been trying to find a few mintues to blog and post some photos...but this Christmas vacation has been one non-stop party.

The kids have all had multiple sleepovers, a couple of parties, play dates, and LOTS of wii time.

We rang in the new year with a party at the Kunz house. It was TOTALLY fun, like, Oh, my, gosh.

Okay, if you couldn't tell, it was 80's themed.

Andrea and Rob got Rock Band for Christmas, so we had a battle of the bands, 80's style. Everyone dressed up and rocked out.

I went with the side pony tail, poofy skirt, leg warmer's, and a denim jacket with buttons on it.



Troy went 80's nerd, with pegged pants, tucked in shirt, and braided belt, looped over itself. (That's him and Leslie.)



Troy is convinced that Andrea has an inner rocker.



I think he's right.

More Foolishness

So, I got tagged...twice.

Once from Melanie and once from Jolinda.

So, from Melanie, it was a photo tag, and I was to go to the sixth folder in my photos and post the sixth photo.



Yeah. Katie discovers jello.

And, I in turn tag Jolinda, Lara, Robin (maybe you'll blog), Amy (ditto), Lisa, and Mariann.

Okay, so from Jolinda...we have three things through the years.

So, here goes.

20 years ago:

1. I was living in Huntington Beach, California.
2. I was a Junior in high school and loving every minute of it.
3. I was preparing to meeting with the missionaries and take the discussions.

10 years ago:

1. I was living in Provo, Utah.
2. I just found out that I was pregnant and expecting twins. I cried. A lot.
3. I was putting Troy through law school and working at Franklin Covey.

5 years ago:

1. I was living in Vienna, Virginia.
2. Mikayla was now in the first grade and I had three other children at home.
3. I was still struggling with loving the SAHM thing...and trying to find my bliss.

3 years ago:

1. We were living in the house we live in now.
2. I was now the mother of FIVE and learning to manage life with a husband who travelled frequently.
3. I was happy to have celebrated 10 wonderful years of marriage to my best friend.

1 year ago:

1. The family continued to expand with the addition of our sixth child.
2. I was unable to breast feed the baby, so pumping had become a near full-time job! Oh my gosh, am I glad that's over!!!!
3. I was in book report hell, because third grade is the once a month book report, with an oral report, a written report and a project due each time...with TWO kids to help every month, I thought I would lose my mind.

This year so far:

1. I have found a passion for blogging and digital scrapbooking which occupy a good chunk of my free time.
2. Troy and I were able to go to Paris for a week and enjoy a romantic getaway sans children.
3. Troy has travelled MORE than ever, but we are finding our stride.

Yesterday:

1. We went to see the broken little Taylor family and took Ben a birthday present. Chocolate, of course.
2. We took Mikayla to her very first Young Woman's meeting. Ack. Still feel old.
3. We played hookey from Pack Meeting, because frankly, it just doesn't work for my family. If 7-8pm is too late for an 8year-old-boy to be at the church, it is CERTAINLY too late for my 5 year-old, my 3 year-old and my 1 year-old!!!!!

Today:

1. I got after the kids for being messy...it is a never ending battle.
2. I went to the gym, because, by golly, I am going to lose weight, or die trying.
3. I blogged. Big shock.

Tomorrow:

1. I am getting ready for a baby shower I am throwing on Saturday.
2. I am making dinner for the Taylors. Natalie has to have her leg reset. Poor baby.
3. Troy will only have one more day on his trip. Yay!

Next Year:

1. Hopefully Becky will be in preschool five days a week. What will I do with myself and only one child at home?
2. I am hoping that we might get a second car...so don't keep having to drive Troy to the train!
3. I am hoping that I will have gone to the gym from now and until then, and I will of course be so hot...well, I don't know what.

There you go. Me through the ages.

I tag my sisters-in-law, Kim, Kelly, and Paulette, because none of you blog enough. And, since one good turn deserves another...I tag you too Melanie!!!

Unlucky 13

Well, it's been a while since we have had an episode of "I Love Lucy" Denise style.

So, for your enjoyment, let's call this "I Love Denise: Anniversary Episode."

Scene I

Troy and Denise had been talking about what to do for their anniversary, but nothing sounded quite right.

Well, the time was quickly drawing near, but nothing had really been scheduled, so Denise decides that she is going to go all out and REALLY surprise Troy this year.

The plan: get a babysitter, drive downtown and surprise Troy at this office to enjoy a little dinner in the city and an evening of culture at the Kennedy Center.

Sounds good right?

Scene II

Denise spends the day with the kids, hanging out and enjoying the end of summer. She makes him a wonderful bouquet of "flowers" out of Dove chocolate, his favorite.

Then she gets ready and gets all dressed up to spend this special evening with her man.

The babysitter arrives and Denise is anxious to get into the city...she doesn't want to risk Troy getting on the train before she has a chance to surprise him.

Scene III

All is well. She has made it with plenty of time to spare. The earliest train he would take doesn't even leave until 5:30 pm and she has 20 minutes to spare.

She goes into the building, asks the security guard to call Troy so that she can go up to his office.

No answer.

Uh oh.

Scene IV

Denise calls his office numerous times. No answer.

She calls the operator up in his office, who is nice enough to go and look around for Troy. The operator says, "Well, he isn't in his office, but it doesn't look like he has left yet." Phew.

But where could he be?

She calls his cell phone numerous times. No answer.

Finally, she remembers that he might have his blackberry with him, so she calls that number. No answer.

Where is he?!?!?!

Scene V

Beep, beep.

It is Denise's cell phone buzzing with an incoming text message.

Text message: "I will have to call you later, I am on the quiet train and I can't talk."

dum, dum, dum...

Text message that Troy recives just seconds later: "I am at your office."

dum, dum, dum...

Scene VI

Denise's phone rings, because apparently Troy made record time getting out of the quiet car, into a location in which he could say to his wife, "You're at my office?!?!?"

"Uh, yeah."

So, while Denise was driving in to the city to suprise Troy for their anniversary, Troy left work early and took the train home to surprise Denise.

Let's just say they were both surprised.

Slow News Day

Well, our summer has just become one massive play date...when does school start again?

But, Hilary had this on her blog and I thought it would be fun...

1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn’t matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog.

Now, I know I have a few blog stalkers out there that never leave comments...so here's you chance. Your memory can be about me or about a Troy and we will try and come up a fun one to leave on your blog.

Let the commenting begin...

Let's Talk About Me

My cute niece Katie had this on her blog and challenged her readers to post.

So, I am posting my answers, and asking you to do the same.

All you blog stalkers out there...you KNOW who you are...if you have a blog, let's learn a little more about YOU!

All About ME

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Yes, my uncle Denis.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
Last night. (How sad is that?)

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING
Yes. I am dork who practiced til it looked the way I wanted. Actually, my friend from HB Amy had the BEST handwriting EVER, and when we were young I used to wish my handwriting was as pretty as hers. It isn't but I can live with it now.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Roast beef or Pastrami. It's a tie.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?
Yes. But there are now so many of them I can't remember who they all are. Okay. Really, if you don't count my husband...I have six.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
I don't know...I'm kind of bossy and REALLY opinionated...It would take some getting used to. haha

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A Lot?
Uh, yeah.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS
Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
No sir, no way, no how. And I would kill Troy if he did it (if he survived)!

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I like Honey Bunches of Oats, grape nuts, and raisin bran cruch, but I am not a milk drinker, so I don't have cereal very often.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
No. No shoe laces on flip flops.

12. DO YOU THINk you 're strong?
I liked Katie's answer. I am emotionally strong. Sometimes I am spiritually strong. But physcally, I am a wuss.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
Vanilla. (I know, I am SO boring!)

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
Their clothes. I have a serious wardrobe problem and wish I were a little more put together.

15. RED OR PINK?
Red.

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
Too many things...I hate that I am a yeller. Sigh. REALLY working on this!

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST
My family. They are just too far away.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
I want a blog post. Can't wait!

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Tan shorts. No shoes.

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
Hummus.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Melanie, she's on the phone. hehehe

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Red, bright, obnoxious, fun.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
Katie put down a perfume here, but I'd rather smell chocolate, or anything baking!

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Melanie, still on the phone with her, hehehe

25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
Yes!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
None.

27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown

28. EYE COLOR?
Brown

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No

30 FAVORITE FOOD?
EVERYTHING! It's a problem. I am particularly fond of anything Asian.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGs
Happy Endings.

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Indiana Jones, the new one.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Blue (Troy would be so proud!)

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?
Summer. Live for the beach!

35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Hugs.

36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
Cheesecake Facotry, Chocolate Coconut Cream Cheesecake

37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
Gosh, this is a toughie. Maybe Andrea. Maybe Hilary? Amberlyn?

38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND
Robin and Aimee...it's a tie!

39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
Skelton Coast by Clive Cussler

40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
No mouse pad.

41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV.Late LAST NIGHT?
Nothing.

42. FAVORITE SOUND
Laughter.

43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Beatles...no contest!

44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
So far Korea, but next week, I can say PARIS!!!!!!!!!

45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I can go to Wal-Mart, not need anything, walk around the store for an hour, and spend (wihin pennies) $100.00. It's a gift.

46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Bangkok, Thailand

47. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK?
All my blog stalkers...I know you're there!

48. I am adding one here because Hilary wanted to know:

If you could go back and major in something else or do something else career wise what would it be?
I would have loved to have been a book editor.

Just Roll Me Out

So, last night was our big night out.

Troy and I went on a date and took Anne and Ben out to the Melting Pot as a thank you for helping paint our family room.

Holy Cow it was good!

It was so much fun to eat fondue and just enjoy the evening. It took almost three hours to eat! We had cheese fondue with bread, apples, and vegetables. Then a salad. We had a huge selection of meats for our entree, and of course, chocolate for dessert.

We had never been before, but we are sure going to go again! I am still full, but it was totally worth it!

And as a little bonus, just for reading, I've even included a photo of me and Troy. Two photos of me in just one week. So there!